Shameless Self-Promotion from Tony Rubino
Why Didn't I Think of That? proves not all successful inventions are the greatest thing since sliced bread (not even sliced bread, which is literally just a precut loaf for lazy loafs). This humorous guide to ?mind-blowing? inventions deconstructs just how complex these can't-live-without necessities really are, while providing some insightful(ly funny) lessons to future inventors, such as:
Yo-yos: Deadly weapons do make great kids' toys.
Soccer: Boredom is the stepmother of invention.
Bottled water: There is no such thing as a stupid idea.
Complete with useful trivia--like the fact that 100 trillion paperclips have been sold--readers will be able to impress their friends by hardly trying.
Get into Heaven or your money back!
Ccc Pubns (February 1994) 8.5 x 5.5 x 0.5 inches
Dogs live life with a joy and abandon most humans envy. This book of sayings and dog-isms will give you a glimpse into the canine psyche. It will amuse, and maybe inspire-no, probably just amuse readers. Rubino's illustrations are equally funny.
A fool and his half a sandwich are soon parted.
If you love something, set it free. If it comes back it's yours. If it doesn't come back, bark and bark and then bark and bark and just bark and bark and bark and bark and bark.
Berber carpets make pretty good butt scratchers. Persian rugs will do in a pinch if the pile is deep enough. But shag! Oh, shag is just a little slice of heaven.
Cats are complex creatures and humans could learn a lot from the fickle and aloof way the feline mind works. Cat lovers will enjoy this and cat haters will have all their fears confirmed-your cat is smarter than you, is better than you, and is plotting something sinister. Includes illustrations.
People say, a thousand years ago cats were worshipped as gods. That implies this is no longer the case. Aren't people CUTE when they're in denial?
Cats may seem pompous and self-absorbed, but that's only because we're so pretentious and uppity. Wait . . . that didn't come out right.
If you get upset when your person touches your tail one day-then the next day, you like it when they touch your tail, they're going to wonder why you're messing with their heads like that. Excellent. Your job is done.
People make a big fuss when you unravel the entire roll of toilet paper. Well, if you can think of a way to spin that thing for, like, 5 minutes WITHOUT unrolling it, I'd like to hear it.
A collection of important life lessons from the irresistible Brady clan includes ""When someone first gets braces, ignore them and treat the person like you always do,"" and ""Never, ever go surfing with a small, cursed idol around your neck.""
Featuring hundreds of time-honored tips that make it easier for anyone to get ahead in a world filled with back-stabbing, manipulative, sex-crazed soap stars, this witty book is perfect for the millions of Melrose Place fans.
Life Lessons from Elvis is a long overdue book that allows Elvis, the King of Rock and Roll, or whatever you want to call him to share things his life has taught him such as:
The right cape can be very slimming.
Never wear metal-based fabric in a thunderstorm.
There's nothing like the look in your little girl's eyes when you present her with her very first monogrammed golf cart.
You've got to be firm with children, especially when they're your wife.
Your hair can be downright "Pompadourable" if you comb it just right.
From the invention of the electric chair to the less offensive post-it note, "Bollocks! Why Didnt I Think of That?" features 101 clever inventions we could no longer imagine life without. Each ingenious invention comes complete with its history and handy trivia - I bet you you didn't know early Romans used porcupine quills as tooth-picks? Or that 1,000,000,000 Barbies have been sold worldwide? This must-have guide will allow you to impress your mates with your newfound fascinating knowledge of every invention from toilet paper to the Theory of Evolution. And it will have you slapping your head in no time, thinking "Bollocks! Why didn't I think of that?"