Le Year of Le Cat
Speaking in New York where he is the guest of old friends Bill and Hillary Clinton, an angry Le Cat said he had no connection with Star Wars and that the whole story was a “complete hoax” fabricated by cartoon rivals jealous of his fame and fortune.
“Why would I, Le Cat, want to be associated with cardboard cutout cartoon characters with silly names like Han Solo and Luke Skywalker?” He did not however deny his reported affair with Princess Leia...
"I would personally like to thank Chris, Frank, Michael, Hugo, Tiffany, Francesca, Chris and the whole of the New York Fire Department for saving me from certain death at the hands of these dangerous hooligans!"
LET SKYWALKER WALK THE SKY… LE CAT STRIDES LE GLOBE!
“The fact that my new album – available now in selected bookshops and on my Webshop – is called ‘The Cat Strikes Back’ is a complete coincidence and the words ‘May the laughter be with you!’ were invented by the man who draws me. If anyone is to blame, it’s him. Go and talk to Philippe Geluck, if you can find him. He’s probably on one of his yachts or private jets”.
A PUBLICITY STUNT?
In other developments, the magazine “Hello Celebrity Nobodies!” quoted anonymous sources that the whole Star Wars episode had been invented by Le Cat’s own publicity department to promote sales of his new album.
On the video: Angry fans, disappointed that Le Cat will not be in the new Star Wars movie, protest outside his luxury hotel in New York.
Over a year before Disney releases Star Wars Episode VII, the studios have asked Le Cat to kick off and head up their advance promo campaign! The studios clearly realised that bringing Le Cat on board so early would be a sure-fire way of creating worldwide interest in the new movie. Both Han Solo and Luke Skywalker applauded the move and said they could think of no-one better to bring the style, class, chutzpah, and sheer pre-paid bums on seats needed for their new adventure. Princess Leia, who is believed to have been in a relationship with the feline for several months last year, said "I’ve never known anyone who can be so intelligent and stupid at the same time. He is just so cute and utterly adorable. We are still very good friends, and he often comes round for a game of strip scrabble."
New album to mark campaign launch
Coming close on the heels (or should we say paws !!) of his recent cartoon album "Le Cat", the world’s favourite feline has published a special Cartoons Volume 2 to mark his Star Wars connection. It’s called… wait for it… "Le Cat Strikes Back" and is now available from Le Cat’s Webshop. (http://goo.gl/BcCDED)
The content of the album has got absolutely nothing to do with Star Wars (they didn’t pay him enough to go that far) but its cartoons, strips, engravings, exclusive extracts from Philippe Geluck’s Universal Encyclopedia… and the Venus de Milo (who appears and reappears in every shape, size, form, age, place and avatar) make up an even more eclectic mix than in his previous album.
Burning speculation – will there be a Cat Vader?
It is not yet known if Le Cat will have a part in the new movie, but all the celebrity magazines are awash with speculation, following Le Cat’s cryptic words on the cover of his new album… "May the laughter be with you!"
So wrote Shakespeare in his play "Romeo, Juliet & Le Cat" over 400 years ago.
He realised way back then that entertainers will always change their names for fame, fortune and money ... or because their own is too long, unrememberable, or just crappy. Bob Dylan (Robert Zimmerman), Sting (Gordon Matthew Thomas Sumner), John Le Carre (David Cornwell), Bono (Paul David Hewson - now that's a crappy name, but then so is ‘Bono’ ...), David Bowie (David Jones), Iggy Pop (James Newell Osterberg Jr.), Cher (Expensive), and Johnny Hallyday (Jean-Philippe Smet)*, are just a few.
Following this age-long tradition Le Chat changed his name to seek fame and fortune in the AngloWorld, and he became The Cat ... for a while. Until somebody told him that there's a whole giga-bunch of AngloSpeakers out there who think that everything French is really really cool, not realising that this is because the Frenchies are the biggest self-promoters, BSAs, and snow-job operators on the planet.
Frenchie is Cool
So Le Chat - now The Cat - decided that he was pretty Frenchie himself, and he'd call himself ... Le Cat (you’re still following I hope). There were two reasons for this. The first was to distinguish himself from all the other cats in the AngloEntertainment world (Fritz, Sylvester, Garfield, Azrael, Butch, Duchess, Felix and ... Hello Kitty, amongst others). And the second of course was to ride the WeLoveEverythingFrenchie wave and surf himself to the top.
So there you are. When you meet him he might even do a little Maurice Chevalier-cum-Inspector Clouseau on you if you're really lucky ("Ello, ello, mamwazelle, I just lerrrv zat leetle black dress. Eet eez so ... black, so ... Odraay Epberrn !").
Ladies and Gentleman, please welcome ... Le Cat !
Johnny Hallyday - Belgian Rock 'n Roll singer who changed his name in the 1960s and went to France in the hope of becoming the French Elvis Presley. Unknown outside France, he has become a French national monument and treasure, has sold millions of albums, and is loved by all, from young girls to ageing rockers, ex-hippies to coal-miners, philosophers and intellectuals to Prime Ministers and Presidents. But nobody outside France has the slightest idea why.
Yes, Le Cat's travels around the globe over the past 10 months have been a real eye-opener for Francophonia's Favourite Feline, and now he can speak English he can understand and converse with a whole new swathe of the world's population.
A year of achievements
"The Bible According to Le Cat" is shortly to be published in Brazil (yes!) and the Netherlands and Flanders (following closely on a collection of cartoons entitled "De Kat"), and an album of cartoons is to be published in the Lebanon. And finally a new album of cartoons in English will be published in September, simply called "Le Cat" (a lot of costly marketing and branding people were involved in coming up with that title, I can tell you). The feline is now a regular contributor to the California-based comics platform AlphaComedy, and to cap it all, he has found three super literary agents for the USA, UK, China, and Japan.
Le Cat's travels
Le Cat has travelled to Japan, New York, Mexico and India, meeting a whole bunch of interesting people who couldn't wait to have their photos taken holding one of the feline's albums and has been followed avidly by yours truly, your roving reporter, Farhat Ajnabi, who has produced not only these exquisite News items, but a mini-series of video reportages on the feline's Indian Tour (which I though were pretty good, given the meagre budget they gave me ... .)
So, what a year, eh?
And what does next year have in store? Keep reading these pages and you'll find out ... .
Enjoy your summer !
It's "La Rentrée" !!!
La Rentrée (The Coming Back) dear readers, is a very European event, and more specifically a French and Belgian thing. Children have two months' holiday from school in July and August - a time when parents have to juggle their calendars, mothers, fathers, uncles, aunts and best friends to be able to find a way to get the kids looked after for 8 weeks without losing their jobs. After this ordeal, and maybe a holiday on a sun-soaked beach or a house in the country - there comes La Rentrée, which occurs round about the beginning of September, when all this happy holidaymaking comes to an end, the kids go back to school, and some sort of economic activity slowly restarts for an interim period before the end-of-the-year holidays ... .
You will have noticed that Le Cat has also been away for the summer - no News since July - but now he's back too. And what a Rentrée!!
While the rest of Europe was sunning itself on beaches and sipping cocktails under parasols, he was preparing his "Cadeau de la Rentrée" - a new cartoon album in English entitled "Le Cat", and it's just been published.
Last year's "The Bible according to The Cat" was a complex, hilarious, graphic novel. "Le Cat" is a collection of Classic Cat Cartoons for those in the Angloworld who don't know this side of him.
So wait no longer. Revel in Le Cat for La Rentrée! Buy a copy! www.geluck.com/en